Thanks, Fresh Prince!

Like a lot of my friends, I grew up watching The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.  I LOVED it!  I love it now in reruns.  It makes me laugh everytime.  So, I often catch myself humming the catchy little tune.  Today, as I was trying to nap, it popped into my head. 

As the words ran through my mind, I was struck by the opening verse and how much it applies to my life now. 

"This is a story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down.  I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there.  I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air." 

Colon cancer and the effects of tumor removal have flipped my life upside down in the last 3 months.  I went today to finish the colonoscopy that they tried to start in the hospital.  In the hospital, they only got as far as the first turn and BAM! a tumor blocking the whole intestine!  So, now that it's been removed and my guts have had time to heal, it's time to finish that baby up. 

Well, today they found 8 more polyps.  In case you don't know, that's a BUNCH!  It's a truck load.  1 in particular has my GI doctor quite concerned.  Of course, he won't say much except that it's got to be sent away for testing.  Well, that's never good when your doctor won't directly answer your questions.  It means "I have a horrible feeling but I won't tell you now." He was just very casual. 

Now.... up until this point, I've really taken everything with a grain of salt.  Thought I was going to the ER for a couple hours to get checked out.......Ended up being admitted and staying 15 days.  Tumor completely blocking the colon, had to come out regardless.......Wake up to find an ostomy bag and an open incision from my belly button to my breast bone.  Cancer staged at IIIB......Need to be pretty aggressive to beat it.  Colostomy bag only going to be temporary for 8 weeks until my guts can heal.......don't want to miss the prime window for chemo so reversal will have to wait 8 months until chemo is done. 

I've, honestly, been ok with every single conversation and decision thus far!  Really!  I'm not saying they made me happy but I was honestly ok.  Today, with the news that there could be more cancer, the fears and what if's are trying to creep in.  But it also makes me realize that there's a lot of fighting left for me to do. 

I kinda thought I might coast through this, but God wants to use me with this.  I'm just not sure how. Not sure how to help other people and pay forward all that the support and encouragement that I've gotten from amazing friends. I really don't know where to start. My hope is that this will maybe be a start.  A place for people to come together and support one another!  I'll, of course, post other things going on in my crazy life.  It's just that now my life has been rearranged!